It Pays Off

Finances is one of those areas that often causes marital strife because our many personality types and money habits complicate our mutual spending and saving. There are spenders, savers, misers, control freaks, separate account keepers, live-paycheck-to-paycheck personalities, and so on. We can argue about who is right and who is wrong, but this only creates more animosity and division when it comes to how we manage finances. To me, the best method always involves two components: a plan and teamwork!

When we are undisciplined about our monthly finances and lack a clear plan, we can start to panic when bills and expenses get out of control. We often give up on budgets because they feel like just one more thing to do. A budget, though, is the best way for a couple to work as a team, even (or especially!) when they have different spending personalities. In the budget, you see what comes in and what goes out. You can prioritize what needs to get paid immediately and what can wait. You can build in saving money for the saver and “fun money” for the spender (and for dates!) A budget isn’t ‘eternally fixed’ and should change as your family needs change, but it helps you to make reasonable decisions regarding whether to proceed with a purchase, save for a little longer, or reign in the spending.

Secondly, teamwork is vital. I recommend that both spouses be involved in the monthly bills and financial decisions so you don’t get a contentious imbalance in financial knowledge and decision making. Break up the tasks according to your individual strengths. One thing to note is that keeping separate accounts OFTEN create concerns and possible suspicions between spouses. Ultimately, the goal is to be on the same page and to create a system that involves both spouses working together.

ACTION STEP: This week, sit down with your spouse and see if you can plan a way to unite your financial efforts and build (or rebuild) a working budget.